Wednesday

Sleep is difficult again, right now.  It's very cold outside, which makes Lee preternaturally cold and causes him to want a warm bedroom.  And I prefer a cold bedroom.  Add to that the return of hot flashes - so far, not constant, but certainly annoying, and requiring me to kick the covers off.  So I'm a bit tired.  150.6 this morning again.  Here's yesterday:

• scrambled eggs
• bacon
• tea with cream
• the new usual supplements
• two clementines
• meat loaf (1-1/2 pieces)
• sauteed mushrooms and onions in butter
• green beans
• salad with blue cheese, cranberries, walnuts, and balsamic vinaigrette
• one chocolate almond cherry thing
• three handsful of cashews

I did stop there - full - in the evening, which I guess is a good thing.  More salad-with-meat variation tonight, though not sure what, exactly.  I had a piece of cheese for breakfast this morning; we didn't want to get up.  Two more clementines with me should that prove insufficient.  But most of my calories in the evening, certainly.

Tuesday

I think yesterday I achieved a bit of traction in controlling some of the cravings and what-not.  And 150.6 this morning, so maybe it will pay off.  Here's the day:

• scrambled eggs
• bacon
• orange juice (just a little)
• the new usual supplements (the old ones plus copper, iodine and C)
• two clementines
• queso dip and chips (but not many - fewer than 10)
• steak-and-wedge salad with blue cheese dressing
• a chocolate-almond-cherry thing
• a handful of shredded cheddar
• a handful of cashews

I think that was it.  Did breakfast this morning again - not sure if skipping it has caused problems over the past few weeks or not - and have two more clementines with me at work.

Regarding a move toward the PHD, obviously, I added the 3 supplements to my morning.  I'm thinking that getting the pound of starchy veg per day could be interesting, to say the least.  But I'm also thinking that an occasional Domino's gluten-free pizza can be added to the family menu, and maybe some other starch-based items.  So I need to be thinking of menus.  They also suggest frequent bone-based broth/stock, which I do make, although not the way they describe; I think cooking it for 24 hours with a bit of vinegar extracts pretty much everything out of a bone, rather than 3 or 4 passes of a couple hours each.  And I am doing ferments - got pickles going right now.  And we need to eat them soon - or over the next 2 months or so.

Mardi Gras the end of next week, followed by the cruise.  I think we can manage to eat pretty well on a ship; there will be a beignet consumed in New Orleans, and probably some roux.  After the ball - I just have to fit in that dress and then I can relax.

Monday

Wow.  I've got nothing this morning.  151.4.  Lee and I are committed to eating variations on "meat and salad" for the next two weeks, and after that, don't know.  I added 3 of the PHD supplements to my mornings - copper, iodine, and C.  No idea if they'll do much, honestly.  

Slept like crap last night - added another duvet to the bed and fought with it all night.  My shoulder hurts, my neck hurts, I have a mild headache, and I'm dehydrated - my eyes and skin are drier than dry.  Oh, and hot flashes, of course.  Looks like we're heading in for another round.  That, or I'm feverish - the dry eyes and high temps sound more like that, truly.

This is our last full week before vacation, though.  That's got to be worth something, right?

Friday

151.8 this morning.  I truly am on the brink of throwing my hands up in despair.  Oh, and I'm starting to get a few mild hot flashes, as if things weren't wonderful enough.  Gah!

The ball is two weeks from yesterday.  I can hold on trying to eat more salads and fewer nuts and less cheese and so forth for two weeks, but without any hope of substantive change, I guess.  I did buy a Spanx thing to wear with the ball gown, which will help a bit, but it's just so annoying.

Once we get back from the cruise, I'm going to re-read PHD and try it for real.  I'll use this to make a list of specific actions, and go from there.  Not sure what else I can do, really.  I'm hoping that the change will get me a bit more energetic; of late, I've just been so draggy this winter.

What is it - Thursday?

I flew out Sunday for a 3-day vendor conference in California.  Went to Disneyland that afternoon, including walking to and from (3 miles right there, plus whatever roaming I did in about 4 hours in the park).  I ate pretty well - and had only some almonds for a snack; they didn't offer crap in the afternoons.  Anyway, this morning, despite swollen feet (like in, my shoes don't fit so great), I'm at 151.0.  

Some observations:

• I struggled with the not-snacking thing.  It was hard.  I'm a boredom eater, and I was kind of bored.
• Rolfing allowed me to sleep 3 nights in a hotel bed with a pillow that was so flat as to be non-existent, and feel reasonable today.  My right shoulder, in particular, is feeling pretty good - unlike after 3 nights in the hotel bed with bad pillows back in September.  Huge mobility improvements overall, and substantial pain reduction.  Not 100%, mind you, but adequate.
• While I stayed pretty darn low-carb, I only had leg cramps one night - and it wasn't after the walking.
• I was able to eat low-carb off their dining options - cheese and fruit at breakfast (2 apples and a banana), salad and meat at lunch (one day was pot roast and mac-and-cheese - bizarre combo), and something light in the evening - a Chicken Caesar one night, nothing the following two, actually.  So that went pretty well.
• My stomach rebelled big-time yesterday, and is still unhappy.  I'm not sure what the cause was.
• I did take Melatonin each night, but/and slept like a rock until 3 am local time.  Not sure what goes on at 3 am there.  I was able to get back to sleep fairly easily after.

Anyway, back to the routine.  Meat and salad for dinner tonight, sounds like.  I had a fat-bomb smoothie for breakfast this morning, to get the MCTs going - got in after midnight last night, so am functioning on not a lot of sleep.  Better tomorrow, I desperately hope.

Friday

This is one of those days.  I'm in a putrid mood for a variety of reasons, one of which is that I'm up to 151.0 again this morning.  Here's yesterday:

• scrambled eggs
• sausage (2 patties)
• tea with cream
• the usual supplements
• roast beef (2 thin slices)
• green beans
• shredded lettuce
• pico de gallo
• taco "meat" (Country Buffet - I'm guessing there were fillers)
• queso sauce
• 4 pieces of cheese

And I stopped.  Note that I ate no identifiable sugar yesterday, although the sausage were "maple" flavored.  I see nothing there to add a half-pound to my weight.  Nothing.  It's very irksome.  Effing hormones.

Travel for work early next week, starting on Sunday.  3 days in Anaheim for a conference.  Sunday afternoon at Disneyland.  I'm thinking turkey leg.  Gonna find out where they dispense them this time, by gum.  And get a lot of walking in.  Somehow.  I'm taking beef jerky and walnuts with me as stopgap items, in case the food is atrocious.

Thursday

Sugar is evil.  I hate to agree with Michael Bloomberg about anything, but there it is.  I'm having an awful time resisting the stuff just now, and am back at 150.4 according to the scale this morning.  So I'm sort of thinking that my only hope for the next 3 weeks, until the ball is over, is to avoid eating sugar - a 21-day detox, whether I feel toxic or no.  So that's my plan.  I hope I can do it.

Here's yesterday:

• coconut oil
• tea with cream
• the usual supplements
• beef jerky (2 bags - I was really hungry mid-day)
• 6 chocolate almonds (somebody brought them to work)
• pot roast with juice and veg (carrots and celery)
• baked sweet potato with butter
• 1 dark chocolate cherry almond cluster
• 5 chocolate blueberries
• 2 candy-covered cherries
• 1 Lindt white chocolate ball
• 1 Ghirardelli dark chocolate mint square
• 1 chocolate meltaway thing
• Walnuts, to try to stem the tide
• 2 pieces of cheese

See what I mean?  Once I got started with the dessert items, I had an awful time stopping.  That said, the keto-stix said I was in ketosis at bedtime, and my calves are fasciculating this morning, darn them.  

Stuffed bell peppers for dinner tonight.  And NO dessert.

I'm also going to start climbing the stairs each morning (and on other opportunities as they arise).