Tuesday

155.6 this morning - water.  I'm quite swollen up again, after an evening at the gym.  During which, I must note, I hit my Nike+ FuelBand goal for the first time.  I also "won" 8 hours yesterday.  Easily amused much?  You bet.  Anyway, I'm all stiff and sore this morning - had to get up at 2:30 to get Advil to get back to sleep.

Day 1 of the Whole 30 is over, and went fairly well.  Here's the details:

• tea with cream
  
• the usual supplements
  
• chef's salad with ham, chicken, cheese, and blue cheese dressing
  
• cheese (prior to workout - I was starving!)
  
• Andouille sausage and mustard
  
• cole slaw (commercial, so a bit of a deviation)
  
• pecans with cheese spread
  
• more cheese (starving at bedtime)
  
• 1 tsp honey - I'm not giving that up for anything
  

That said about the honey, it wasn't working all that well last night - or I am having hot flashes again. I woke up at 10:50, 2:30, and just before 5:00 that I know of, and didn't get back to sleep easily any of those times. Feeling a little foggy this morning as a result.  I am getting overheated at night - can't tell if it's too hot in the bedroom or if it's just me, yet.  Probably the latter (heavy sigh). I would so like to be done with this.

At the gym, I did 13 laps, which works out to 1.14 miles - and the last lap was a cooldown. Unfortunately, the FuelBand "session" tracker doesn't track steps, which is a bit odd - I was hoping to work out how long my steps are, for use in figuring distance from the step counter. After the walking workout (I used my lovely progressive racewalk playlist), I did a few weights - inner and outer thighs, arm curls (which were pathetic!), and a back extension machine. I didn't go through all the weights to work out settings and stuff - I need to get some sort of paper set up to record all that on first.  Next trip. 

In the meantime, I will be working on attaining my goal for the "streak" (3 in a row), and winning more hours. Maybe go out and walk outside tomorrow as a New Year's thing. And I need to figure out what I want to achieve with the exercise - leaning out, for sure, but strength or overall endurance? And where?

Monday (after Christmas)

155.0 this morning.  Okay, that's the starting point.  We are beginning a modified Whole 30 this morning - allowing dairy and a little bit of commercially prepared stuff like mayo.  I'm trying to control the whole eating thing for us all by making lunches and so forth - we'll see how that goes.  Today, we're all having chef's salads for lunch - with about the palm-sized portion of meat and cheese.  And Lee and Elizabeth are having baked chicken on top of that. From the deli.  Oh, well.  

Sausages and cole slaw tonight, after a gym trip for Lee and me.  Elizabeth has joined 24-hour fitness with a friend who is getting married in June; they're going 3 or 4 times a week so far, and she's quite stiff and achy.  It's all good, though.

My gym trip is aimed at getting a baseline measure on the weight machines and doing some walking.  I got a Nike+ FuelBand for Christmas, and I haven't hit the default goal of 2500 fuel points yet, although I got close on Friday by spending most of the day walking around Santa Fe.  So tonight's another window of opportunity to get the points racked up.  It's an interesting tool, and I've been wanting a forgettable pedometer-type thing for a while, so I think it will be helpful.

Food yesterday was mostly good, although it did involve eating up some of the last of Christmas leftovers, and I had way too many cashews.  Snacking is one aspect of the Whole 30 I will be working on - not snacking, that is; eating only when hungry. Not going to bother going into details.

I think that's it for now.

Monday

I think I have just laid my big stressor to rest, so I am hoping the remainder of the holiday season won't be just one big carb binge.  Which is to say exactly that it has been so far.  155.0 this morning. Lots of potato chips and tortillas over the weekend. I am, I think, going to propose a modified Whole 30 to the family for right after New Year's. We all rely on cheese and dairy of various sorts to keep us going, so it will be a Whole 30 plus dairy.  I don't know exactly what it might involve - and I'll have to go re-read my Whole 30 guide before I lay it out for us, but I think they'll be on board with it.

That's all for now.

Friday

Useful info for future reference.  Honey, good as it is, does not help one sleep when one's adult daughter is out until 3 am on a work night and not responding to texts or calls. I'm very glad I'm not commuting today; I've had maybe 3 hours of sleep, total. On the other hand, not having human contact today could be a real problem as regards staying awake.

I have not weighed myself today.  Yesterday was much improved for eating; I did have 2 mini candy canes and a handful of chocolate coconut almonds, but that was it for the bad stuff.

I have not eaten yet; think I'll wait until 9ish, so I sleep until around 6 tomorrow - research apparently indicates that waking is timed to 3 hours before the first meal.

Thursday

154.8 again. More crap yesterday.  French fries and potato chips this time. I'm not completely out of control here, but not under much control either. Life craziness is crashing into us repeatedly, and I go for the carbs to help cope. Understandable, but kind of annoying just now.

I have eaten breakfast today, I have disposed of the candy in my desk, and I have walnuts.  Going to try to get this right again today.  Ugh.

Wednesday

And more garbage yesterday.  154.8 this morning.  I am fasting today, even if it hurts like hell. Enough said.

Tuesday

Ugh. I spent yesterday eating crap. No other way to describe it, really.  152.8 today.  Here's yesterday:

• tea with cream
  
• cheese (a lot throughout the day)
  
• Brach's peppermint nougats (5)
  
• potato chips
  
• multiple almond flour shortbread cookies with chocolate ganache
  
• 1 tsp honey
  

I think that was it; it felt worse than that. I found the candy at the Target near work; the one by our house doesn't carry it any more.  It's my idea of the perfect Christmas candy - peppermint-flavored and chewy, and not too sweet.  Made with corn syrup as the first ingredient, though, so I cannot even pretend it's benign.

No ketosis at bedtime, obviously.  I am armed with cheese and salami and two of the cookies today; will that be enough to keep me eating healthy?  I tend to doubt it. Life has been annoying lately, and I'm struggling to avoid a sugar bender - not very successfully, either.

Sleep's been okay.  Woke last night briefly at about 1 am, then again some time after 4.  Both times I fell asleep again almost immediately after checking the time. Lots of dreams, though I don't remember them.

Monday

153.0 this morning.  Here's yesterday:

• tea with cream
  
• scrambled eggs
  
• canadian bacon
  
• cheese
  
• almond flour shortbread cookies with chocolate-amaretto ganache (4 total)
  
• a tiny bottle of prosecco
  
• boneless short ribs braised in beer and beef stock (a keeper)
  
• mashed cheesy cauliflower
  
• a lot of cashews
  
• 6 chocolate coconut almonds
  
• a teaspoon of honey
  

I was craving salt last night - not entirely sure why, but I ate cashews to help with it.  I wish humans could just do a salt lick, or something. Anyway, I'm still recovering from my massage on Saturday - it was amazing in terms of finding and killing off what was ailing me, but resulted in a lot of reactive inflammation.

I need to get life under control again; with it wonky, eating goes wonky.

For what it's worth, putting ganache on the shortbread was a total success.  It's dark chocolate from a Lindt 85% bar, heavy cream, and amaretto, so it's not very sweet, and just suits the shortbread cookies perfectly. Very rich.

Friday

Slightly less hostile today, but not happy.  A couple of things going on - some stress, to start with, that's fueling things, and hormones are doing something odd, I think. I slept well enough, considering we had dog interruptions all night again.  That's getting old.

I got to bed late due to work last night, but despite that and the stress thing, got to sleep really quickly - probably less than 15 minutes after we put the lights out. And after getting up about an hour later with one of the dogs wanting outside, I got right back to sleep. The honey is good stuff.

However, I'm apparently not eating properly - that, or the hormone/stress stuff is causing some weight storage to occur.  152.6 this morning. And I feel all puffy.  Here's yesterday, as I remember it:

• tea with cream
  
• egg custard
  
• 2 sausage patties
  
• the usual supplements
  
• 2 pieces of chocolate - a Lindor truffle, and a peppermint bark - not low-sugar
  
• Beef with broccoli
  
• a bottle of hard cider
  
• about 6 almond-flour shortbread cookies
  
• a coconut flour muffin
  
• 1 tsp honey
  

A little carby, not all that bad compared to a SAD day, but high for me. Need to get back on the wagon, as it were.

Thursday

I am in an absolutely horrid mood this morning. Life feels very out of control, so I will need to spend a bit of time figuring out why before I can really get anything accomplished, I suspect.  

151.6 this morning, and I really don't care.  Sleep would have been okay if the dogs hadn't woken us up twice last night - once by making odd noises, and once by jumping on us.  That could certainly be part of the reason why.

I. Hate. Winter.  I'm just done with it. It's too damn dark out, the sun is in my eyes in the morning and slows the commute - already filthily bad - to a dead stop.  And the cold makes me cranky.

I ate stuff yesterday.  Undoubtedly too much of it.  Fine. Whatever. Hope to be better today.

Wednesday

Weird sleep - I dreamt that I woke up and checked the time and it was 3:25 am; when I actually woke up at 2:21 am, I was very confused.  My leg was a little less of a problem; the real problem was the cat, who was in a congenial mood all night and kept walking on my hair.  

150.4 this morning.  Here's yesterday:

• scrambled eggs
  
• tea with cream
  
• bacon
  
• a coconut-flour muffin
  
• 6 almond flour shortbread cookies
  
• 3 pieces of cheese
  
• an entire 10" gluten-free pizza with pepperoni, mushrooms, and green peppers
  
• 1 tsp honey
  

I kept the sugar out of the evening; don't know if that helped or not.

Tuesday

Sleep last night was not so great. Hot flashes woke me at 10:30, 1:something, and 3:25. The less-deep sleep meant that my hip started hurting. I think it's possible that some stretches I did on Sunday had the most to do with it not hurting that night, so I will be doing more of those stretches.

All that said, I feel well-rested and alert this morning, and I had vivid, remarkable dreams. And I'm at 150.0 this morning.  Here's yesterday:

• tea with cream
  
• a coconut-flour, chocolate, dried-cherry muffin
  
• eggnog
  
• naked Double Quarter Pounder with cheese
  
• Qdoba bowl of shredded beef, salsa, cheese, sour cream, and guacamole
  
• about 6 dark chocolate coconut almonds
  
• a couple of almond-flour shortbread cookies
  
• 1 tsp honey
  

I was expecting to have stalled, or be a bit heavier this morning. Nice surprise to find that wasn't it.

I think I will avoid sweets after dinner tonight, see if only having the honey fixes the issue. But honestly, I don't think there's much I can do regarding the menopause symptoms. Sheer exhaustion might help me sleep through them, but I'm not exhausted. Ugh.

Monday

150.4 this morning, which may be what it was on Saturday morning, if I recall correctly.  It was up a pound yesterday, and now back down.  Whatever.

So, after a third night of bad sleep, I went back to the honey on Saturday night.  Some improvement then, and last night was hugely better.  Both nights, I dropped off so quickly that I hardly recall being awake at all.  Last night, I slept in a state of floppy relaxation until 3:25, when I woke up thinking it must be approaching morning, checked the time, turned on something on my iPod and went right back to sleep.  Woke again at 5:10 after a dream in which I was doing a cattle call audition for a part in Guys and Dolls, for reasons I cannot explain - couldn't in the dream, either.  Anyway, the first night in a long time (even with the honey) that I wasn't awakened with hip pain.

I spent much of yesterday cooking.  Egg custards for breakfasts this week, eggnog (FINALLY NAILED IT!!!), almond flour shortbread (they're frozen in a log at the moment; I'll slice and bake them tonight), and coconut flour muffins.  I think the muffin recipe has hit on the perfect ratio for working with coconut flour - 6 eggs, 1/2 cup flour, 1/4 cup melted butter, and 1/2 cup other liquid. I added amaretto (not enough), dried cherries, and hunks of 70% cacao chocolate), and the results rose perfectly, browned perfectly, and are seriously delicious.  I'm going to use that same ratio for some orange-cranberry bread for Christmas morning.  I also think it could be the perfect batter for making Paleo fruitcake (none of that neon-green citron crap, but with currants, raisins, apricots, dried cherries, and nuts - tell me that doesn't sound amazing).

Here's yesterday, which was busy:

• tea with cream
  
• scrambled eggs with cheese
  
• bacon
  
• ham
  
• pork BBQ (shredded and sliced)
  
• cole slaw
  
• BBQ sauce
  
• one dark chocolate coconut almond
  
• ham
  
• baked sweet potato with butter
  
• pumpkin pie innards (no whip cream)
  
• 1/3 of a muffin, to see what they tasted like
  
• 1 tsp honey
  

Tasty, if a bit pork-centric.  We have ordered our Turducken for Christmas dinner - with Creole stuffing (the trinity and andouille sausage are involved, I know). I made the pie innards on Saturday, and they are wonderful - I think it's better with Grade B maple syrup than with sugar.  And the eggnog is just sweet enough, and with the addition of Rum flavoring extract (I'd guess actual Rum would work as well), I finally found the missing taste that turns it from custard into nog.

A very good weekend.

Friday

151.2 this morning.  Sleep was decidedly worse last night than the night before or any of the honey nights. A lot of tossing and turning, and I woke up multiple times between 1 and 5. If tonight's similarly bad, the honey will be restarting tomorrow. It's good to do this, though; I was starting to think I was having a bit of confirmation bias.

Here's yesterday:

• tea with cream
  
• salami - 6 slices
  
• Caesar salad
  
• prime rib with horseradish sauce
  
• asparagus
  
• fruit - berries and pineapple
  
• beef-vegetable soup
  
• cheese
  
• about 7 dark chocolate coconut almonds
  

I think that was it.  I saw a stronger "trace" ketosis measurement at bedtime than yesterday. My stomach is unhappy this morning, so I had just a couple pieces of cheese this morning and will be keeping things light.  Not sure what is bugging it; lunch yesterday was pretty clean, unless there was some sort of herb crust on the prime rib.

Thursday

151.8 this morning; sleep (without honey) much the same.  I woke up around 3:45, I think, with a hot flash.  These days, I've only been having them at night, and occasionally on the way in to work with the seat heater on. So that was night 1 of the week without honey for sleep.  I don't know if things will degrade as it "wears off" or what.  I did have some sugar after dinner, which, based on Seth Roberts' theory, might work in exactly the same way.  Here's yesterday:

• egg custard
  
• tea with cream
  
• two string cheese sticks
  
• cheddar cheese
  
• cashews (less than a handful, I think)
  
• a burger with swiss cheese, guac, and jalapenos
  
• cottage cheese
  
• two pickle slices
  
• 6 dark chocolate coconut almonds
  

I think that was it.

We are all struggling mightily with being functional right now - dark short days, the cold, job-hatred are all working together to put us into hibernation, basically.  So it probably doesn't help at all that I'd moved mostly out of ketosis.  Trying to get back into a fairly solid measurement on the ketostix, but to no avail so far - just "trace" last night. I had a bunch of salami this morning for breakfast, hoping the fat will help.  We have a lunch for work today, and I think it offers good opportunities to eat well - lots of meat and veg served without bread.

Wednesday

152.2, and more shit sleep. I think I'm going to stop the honey for a week and see if that changes anything. The weight - easily explained.  Here's yesterday:

• egg custard
  
• tea with cream
  
• two pieces of cheese
  
• chips and salsa
  
• two cheese enchiladas with green chili
  
• one square maltitol-sweetened chocolate
  
• walnuts
  
• one tsp honey
  

I'm bloated and feel rather nasty this morning, although the enchiladas were lick-the-plate delicious. I guess I need to learn to make decent green chili again, and start making enchiladas at home. That way, they come without the chips and salsa.

Very late night last night getting home - dinner well after 6:00. And an early day today so far - my commute lasted 2 hours and started at 6 am.  Ugh. "Life" is getting short shrift just now.

Tuesday

151.2 and shit sleep last night.  Here's yesterday:

• egg custard
  
• tea with cream
  
• the usual supplements
  
• beef jerky
  
• peanuts
  
• bean-free chili
  
• cheese
  
• cashews
  
• 2 squares maltitol-sweetened dark chocolate
  
• 1 tsp honey
  

Shit sleep, to be sure, but interestingly, I feel refreshed and rested this morning.  So I guess the honey is still working. I had calf cramps overnight, and was in "trace" ketosis at bedtime. The cashews were eaten primarily for the salt; I had a head/neck ache last night and salt seemed to be what was needed.  I think it pays to listen to these things. However, it probably is where the extra pound came from - water retention.

Onward!

Monday

In general, I think we had a good Thanksgiving holiday - a little family time, a little shopping, got the house decorated for Christmas, including outdoor lights, and we ate okay.  Not perfect, but okay. 150.0 this morning, which means, I think, that I lost a pound over the 4 days. Considering I ate carbs to what I think of as excess both Saturday and yesterday, it might even be real.

Sleep was generally good.  I tried eliminating the melatonin and just doing the honey a couple of nights - while the overall quality was still pretty good, it took longer to get to sleep, and I did find myself thrashing a lot more in the early morning hours.  So I went back to the combo, and it is still working great. If only I could find a curative for the hot flashes that worked as well...

Here's yesterday:

• omelette with ham, cheese, and tomatoes
  
• about 1/2 of a portion of hash browns
  
• tea with cream
  
• a handful of cashews
  
• some cheese - I think only 2 pieces
  
• 5 dark chocolate coconut almonds
  
• 2 squares maltitol-sweetened dark chocolate
  
• meatballs with spaghetti sauce and cheese
  
• salad with balsamic vinaigrette
  
• walnuts
  
• 1 tsp of honey
  

I also made more egg custards yesterday, so that was breakfast today, and I didn't bring anything with me to eat, which might mean I fast to dinner, or it might mean I eat my last package of jerky. Hard to say just yet.

I wasn't in ketosis at bedtime yesterday.  I know I need more fat in the diet, and will be attempting to get some breakfast in each morning this week, since that's a good opportunity to eat fat. Hoping it works!