Friday

Better sleep last night. Certainly should have been; I took major precautions, including eating Mexican for dinner (chips, salsa), taking 2 Mag Citrates, a bath with Epsom Salts, and rubbing both legs with Magnesium Oil. First night with dreaming in quite a while, although they were some very weird dreams.

The Mexican was sort of a mistake in other ways, though. 158.8 this morning. Sigh. I decided on  the way to work that I need to decide whether or not I'm actually dieting, and if I am, to commit to it. And that would mean going to a Mexican restaurant only for Fajita meat and veg. Last night, I had chips and some chicken/cheese/jalapeno things wrapped in bacon. From the taste, the chicken may have been breaded. 

Here's yesterday:

• tea with cream
  
• the usual supplements
  
• scrambled eggs
  
• bacon
  
• walnuts
  
• 4 pieces of Kerrygold Dubliner
  
• chips and salsa
  
• queso
  
• chicken/cheese/jalapeno things wrapped in bacon
  
• a small amount of rice
  
• a small amount of beans
  
• a strawberry Haagen-Dasz
  

That doesn't even look healthy in a list. 

Weekend coming. Fish for dinner tonight, shrimp some time this weekend in some form. Hopefully some natural exercise while doing stuff. Hopefully some time outdoors. Depends on the weather.

Thursday

An edict has been issued: No more good sleep. Somewhere, by someone. I don't know who. But last night, it was properly cool and dark, the dogs were in their kennels, and all should have been well. So I had leg cramps for hours, starting around 1 am, I think. And not easy calf cramps, either; these were shin and outer ankle cramps that twist the foot up into very unnatural positions. They subsided enough for me to get back to sleep periodically, but when I got up at 6, I still had them. 

I take potassium and magnesium. I drink Gatorade with the latter in the evening, to try to keep in electrolyte balance. And last night, before bed, I ate quite a large quantity of salty potato chips. Amongst all that, I SHOULD have been fine. I wasn't.

So I'm tired and achy again this morning. 157.4 - whether it was the salt in the chips, the chips themselves, or the fact that I had breakfast yesterday, I do not know. Not a big gain, maybe just a blip. We shall see. Here's yesterday:

• tea with cream
  
• the usual supplements (you don't suppose adding them in did all that, do you?)
  
• scrambled eggs
  
• sausage patties
  
• walnuts
  
• 3 pieces of Kerrygold Dubliner
  
• about 1/2 pound of grassfed ground beef (in patties)
  
• mushrooms and asparagus sauteed in butter and pan drippings
  
• a handful of cashews
  
• a mouthful of Gatorade
  

Kind of a long list, really. I think we're having something seafood tonight. Not sure what.

It's still raining. Good for the crops. Not great for walking outdoors. But I'm not really in the mood for that right now anyway.

Wednesday

And the lovely week of catch up sleep draws to a chaotic end. Charlie would not be appeased last night; now that Lee is home, he had to sleep with him. So he did. And Anneke wanted up several times, probably due to thunder outside. Which I think I would have slept through, left to my own devices. Oh well.

I'm really sleepy and achy this morning. And it's dark and stormy out, so no bright sunlight to wake me up, either.

Guess it could be a long day.

157.2 this morning, and I'm puffy still. Water leaving slowly, I guess. Here's yesterday:

• tea with cream
  
• walnuts
  
• 3 pieces of Kerrygold Dubliner cheese
  
• hot and sour soup
  
• half an order of Mushu pork, no pancakes
  
• a few fried noodles
  
• a fortune cookie
  

I think that was it. Chinese usually puts me in a stall, so it's nice to see I lost a bit overnight.

Life can now return to normal. Well, home life, that is. Work is being a bit stressier than I would have liked. But there's not much I can do about it, except to try to find something less so. That's always a long slog, though. In the meantime, I'm trying to see the funny side of it all.

Tuesday

Well, at least I didn't gain. A bizarre thing to say after eating hardly anything, but that's my story and I'm sticking to it.

157.4 this morning, a slight loss.  Here's yesterday:

• tea with cream
  
• walnuts (really not many)
  
• 3 pieces of Kerrygold Dubliner cheese
  
• ground beef with salsa, tomatoes, sour cream, and cheese
  
• a mixture of salted peanuts, dark chocolate chips, and dried cranberries
  
• a swallow of Gatorade
  

I always forget that last thing - like I forget when I have hot chocolate at work because there is no decent tea upstairs. I have been taking a nightly magnesium citrate with a swig of Gatorade (for the other electrolytes) to ward off leg cramps. Whether it's been that, or whatever I've been eating (hardly any carbs), the leg cramps have been mostly not a problem.

Back to eating breakfast tomorrow, I think. Lee should be home tonight, and I'm grateful. The putter weekend alone was all right - got lots of small stuff done that I've had on my list - but handling work stress alone has not been at all nice this past week.

Sleep good again last night. I didn't even have audio to fall asleep - apparently passed out on the way to turn it on, because the speaker was in position, but the night's fall-asleep playlist had not even been selected. And I didn't use it in the morning, either. I've needed the sleep, for sure.

As for the weight - there is still water. My fingers are swollen. It will go away. And then we shall see what this period of not really eating much has done. And, I hope, be able to continue it, until my set point (I do tend to believe that exists) moves down a bit.

Monday

Good weekend. Productive, didn't eat much, de-stressing (which helped until I made it into the office, but you can't have everything). Got decent sleep, including last night, which was really good.

So, of course, I gained a pound. Water, I promise - I ache from head to toe this morning. I painted yesterday, which is why.

157.6. Here's yesterday (which is not unlike Saturday, really):

• tea with cream
  
• 3 pieces of Kerrygold Dubliner cheese
  
• 2 handfuls of cashews
  
• a burger patty - something between 1/3 and 1/2 pound, grassfed
  
• zoodles (a whole zucchini) with butter, sour cream, parmesan
  

That was it. I meant to eat breakfast, but got busy. I meant to eat lunch, but got busy and grabbed a snack. I nearly didn't eat dinner, but thought maybe I should, so I cooked quickly and hoovered it up.

Saturday my first food was peanut M&Ms - a mistake, I should add. Add to that some cheese, cashews, and beef-vegetable soup, and you have the whole day. 

The only thing I probably should have got more of was sunlight. I didn't get outside much, and should have, because the weather was super nice. We need some furniture for the back patio.

Friday

This has been, on average, a no-good, very-bad week. Lots of work stress, nobody to blow off steam with except the dogs, and they've been needy, to say the least. 

That said, I lost a pound yesterday. 156.6 this morning. Which tells me that my success in weight loss 6 years ago had mostly to do with the long stretches when Lee was in Arizona. I'm trying to get ahead of the game while he's gone this time, and maybe get a few of the habits re-ingrained.

Fasted yesterday. Nothing except cream until dinner. Here's yesterday:

• tea with cream
  
• meatballs with spaghetti sauce and cheese
  
• a swallow of Gatorade (cramp preventative)
  

That was it. Fortunately (I guess) work was very busy and I didn't have time to wonder if I was hungry or not.

Today won't be much different - not explicitly fasting, but not eating much - a bit of cheese as breakfast, carrots and dip for the day (and walnuts), and who knows what for dinner. Not chips, though.

Thursday

Ah, hubris.

That whole sleep improvement thing? Completely blown away last night. I let the dog out. I knew I would regret it, and I did. He slept on the small of my back when I lay on my right side, and when I rolled over, my face was full of fur. He does not move. He transforms into lead at night. 

Anyway, I gave up trying to sleep around 3:30, I think. Listened to old radio shows (Information Please is often soothing enough to get me right back to sleep, and entertaining enough if it doesn't work) for about an hour by themselves, then another hour with an overlay of play fighting growling, and then I just turned the light on and read until the alarm went off. Got up, fed them, and got the day started. I don't feel too awful, but it's early.

Fasting today - had a goodly dollop of cream in my tea this morning and will try to make it through to dinner. I think a spot of autophagy is in order; clean up all the dreck from that cold and the stress of the past week. 

157.6 this morning; water, I suspect. I had chips and dip for dinner, which is not exactly salt-free, and certainly not nutritious. I wasn't in the mood to cook. Here's the entire day:

• tea with cream
  
• sliced deli chicken
  
• walnuts
  
• 5 pieces of Kerrygold cheese (getting my vitamin K, anyway)
  
• chips and ranch dip
  
• a large handful of cashews
  
• a limoncello
  

That last was just in the fridge from our bottling activities and after hearing that it tastes right from folks who would know, I figured I'd try it again. Not sure I get the point, but it wasn't bad.

Not doing much this week at home. Reading, letting the dogs through the back doors. That's pretty much it. Thinking a lot, about life and work and that sort of stuff, trying to figure out the best way to spend my time here (on earth). Deep, I know, but that's what alone time is for. No solutions, yet.